The Truth About Male Orgasms

[REPUBLISH] This essay was originally published in two parts in September 2016 and now republished June 2019 with additional information and facts.

Life After “The Little Death”

We are taught that as men we build to an Orgasm (from Greek ὀργασμός orgasmos “excitement, swelling”; also sexual climax) is the sudden discharge of accumulated sexual excitement during the sexual response cycle, resulting in rhythmic muscular contractions in the pelvic region characterized by sexual pleasure.

Orgasm, ejaculate, and then require a refractory period before we can reach those heights again. Our erections go soft and though we may still remain aroused, we are physically incapable of shooting sperm or making our penises spasm with pleasure unless we wait. For some that wait time is minutes, for others it’s hours or even days. Though we’ve come to accept this as a normal part of the male sexual response, I know I speak for all of us when I say that however long that wait time is, it’s too long!

There’s a reason the French call orgasm “La petite mort” (The little death). For edgers, it can really kill the mood. But what if I said the French were wrong? What if I said what you’ve been taught is wrong?

The truth is, your orgasm is far more mysterious and complex than you realize. I should know. I have spent a lifetime mastering my orgasm. As soon as I discovered masturbation I was climaxing somewhere between six to eight times per day every day. One day I went thirteen times.

That kind of regularity of orgasm causes a lot of mess. Plus a lot of evidence that could be used against me. Remember this was a time when I felt shame about whacking off. Now I’m a proud bator so things have changed. But somewhere during my late teens my masturbation went from a means by which I waded as much sperm as I could to a focused and sustained mastery over edging.

What changed? My pursuit of the goal changed. I moved the goal.

The Male Orgasm Defined

Firstly, it is useful to define what male orgasm actually is. If you say “shooting sperm” then you don’t belong in my class! That’s not even half of it. A few spasms of your rigid rod while you spray your stickies over yourself or the furniture doesn’t complete the picture either.

Your orgasm and your ejaculation are not one and the same.Your orgasm and your ejaculation are not one and the same. They are linked, but they are separate. It is important to see your orgasm as both inside and outside of you. Sure, you are cumming when you see cum shoot from your dick, but you are also cumming in the moments before you shoot: all men know this sensation and it is often referred to as “The Point of No Return.”

What I teach my students is that male orgasm is even deeper and more mysterious than that. I would go further as to posit that you have begun cumming well before you hit there. It may even have begun hours before you hit there. Did you mind just blow?

An orgasm is an involuntary spasm. It feels fucking great. It is why we masturbate, why we edge, why sometimes we call in sick for work or turn up late for the party. Your penis is involuntarily spasming in your hand right now. Feel it? There. Just there. In those moments when your hand stops pounding even briefly and your cock responds with a kick. Your orgasm goes back as far as that.

My happy place is not shooting sperm. My happy place is hovering just before the Point of No Return when my penis is spasming all over the place. I cease pounding at this point and my penis throbs three, four, five or six times. Actual spasming throbs and each spasm send bolts of warm electricity through me. Waves circle out, radiating within me at high intensity. Here I am in the throes of orgasm. These are orgasms. They are deep and pleasurable and, as opposed to sperming, can be attained one after another without observing a refractory period.

I want you to practice. Become more mindful of how deep your orgasm is. Note where it begins, where it intensifies. Hover close to the “Point of No Return” and feel those throbs, man!

Perfect this technique and you might graduate to what you really came here for, the tools to ejaculate sperm over and over again in the old-fashioned idea of multiple male orgasms without a refractory period. Okay, okay, so I know how to do that too, and I promise I will teach it to you, but first you must arrive at the realization that your orgasm is epic and incremental. You may well spend your entire life trying to unravel its mystery. At this stage, what is most important is recognizing that your orgasm and your ejaculation are separate.

It might take some time to perfect, but can you think of anything else you’d rather be practicing?

The Secret Of Multiple Male Orgasm Revealed

When students come to me searching to improve their sex lives, it’s not long before the conversation turns to that Holy Grail of sexuality, the ever elusive multiple male orgasm. For many guys, it is all they seek, like a hidden treasure unfairly stolen or denied them. It appears to be something other guys can do, and it drives men crazy to be considered a one pop shop.

My immediate response is to remind them that every orgasm is special. I always say that I gift myself an orgasm rather than give myself one or use the extremely common but desultory phrase “have an orgasm.” You have a penis, but it’s what you do with it that is the gift. It bears reminding how lucky we are that just by rubbing our penises long enough we produce feelings of such bliss that transcend our bodies, the pursuit of which has also forged history as we know it.

An eruption of sperm created each and every one of us. There are five acts common to every man who walks the earth: we are born, we eat, we sleep, die… and along the way we ejaculate sperm. No orgasm is a small thing.

As we discussed above, orgasm and ejaculation are separate phenomena. Technically all males are all capable of multiple orgasms if we recognize that our orgasm happens as we edge, even if we haven’t spewed a droplet of ejaculate.

So with that in mind, we should never feel dissatisfied by the graceful bliss biology has bestowed upon us, I do acknowledge that it would be wonderful to enjoy that bliss twice or three times in a row. Not every time, but sometimes. Hey, we shouldn’t be selfish, should we?

Okay, so here are my useful tips for men and boys interested in creaming themselves repeatedly without having to wait.

Discovering Your Edge

Firstly, the way to cum repeatedly is by not cumming at all. You will need to [simple_tooltip content=’To edge is a masturbation technique (used mostly, but not exclusively by men) where you intentionally bring yourself to the brink (edge) of orgasm – but don‘t cum. Instead, you stop and let the pleasurable feelings die down. You repeat this process of bringing yourself to the edge as many times as you wish (or can).

EDGE. A lot. You will not find the Holy Grail hidden within arm’s reach. Wise men have journeyed for years to find its location. So don’t expect to multi-ejaculate after a five-minute wank. Edge for hours, or days if you can stand it. The longer you edge, the closer you will be to holding that treasure in your hand.

Secondly, get your hand off it. The first time I experienced a multiple male orgasm, I was not seeking it at all. I was very relaxed in a warm bath on a Sunday. I had edged myself for nearly an hour and masturbated my body completely. My nipples were hard-wired to pleasure and I’d given a heap of attention to my taint. Simply put, I was in bliss.

The “So-Called” Ruined Orgasm

The first ejaculation was a mistake of sorts. I didn’t want to ruin my bliss, but I did that thing all edgers dread, which is stroking one time too many on the point of no return. I pulled my hand away, but it was too late. My brain had hit the switch. Sperm erupted from my spasming penis, congealing into sticky strands in the warm water. I didn’t touch myself during the ejaculation, hoping I could somehow salvage myself from the wreck.

Some guys call this a ruined orgasm, which has a negative connotation. Far from ruined, you’ve experienced a wonderful orgasm, intense, and it felt good to cum this way. A kind of hands-free orgasm. What I felt was an “Oh no, I’m going to cum!” jolt, followed by a deep pressure building behind my stiff cock. Then I felt a “will it, won’t it” protracted suspension (elongated because I wasn’t pounding my meat with my fist) before an “ahhhhhh” uncontrollable eruption of jizz from my blissfully spasming dick.

Realizing The Completeness Of Multiple Male Orgasm

What is happening in that “protracted suspension” is that your brain has told your penis to ejaculate. Your sperm is moved from your testes into a small sack at the base of your shaft where it is readied to “shoot” (maybe to make babies, maybe to have competitions with your mates). If you masturbate through this whole process, it is pleasurable, but it is sped up. If you take your hands away, effectively “ruining” it, the process will still happen, and no matter how protracted, something will remain incomplete.

It’s was a sense of incompleteness that overwhelmed me in the warm water of my bath that Sunday. And so I reached down and began to wank again. An immediate and awe-inspiring sense that I could cum again overwhelmed me. Within a minute, more ejaculate was solidifying in the bath water. I repeated the process of taking my hand away, finding my penis again spermed but left yearning. Again, it felt great. So I did it a third time, which took a minute or more, but this time I “rode it out” by fully rubbing my ejaculation to satisfied completion. I had ejaculated three times in as many minutes.

In all my experience, this is the only way I have ever seen a man multi-ejaculate. I’ve seen men take their hands to their nipples, or their taints or their holes, in lieu of riding out their orgasm. In doing so, they gift themselves two, three, four or even five ejaculations. What they’re doing is what I learned by accident in the bath that Sunday. It works. It’s common to all men who are in tune with their bodies.

A Final Note on Relaxation

My final point touches upon a point I made earlier about the brain. Your orgasm happens in your penis, but your brain triggers ejaculation. Unless you have your thinking right, you will never achieve multiple male orgasm. You will never cum a second time by furiously whacking yourself off red and raw, hoping, praying, wishing you could batter some more by wanking harder, faster, stronger… but, no. It won’t work. You must be relaxed and possess an awareness of the rhythms of your body. Finally, you must cultivate an attitude that if it happens, well that’s pretty cool, but if it doesn’t, well worse shit has gone down.

Try it. Put these tips into practice. But please don’t sulk if it doesn’t work. No screaming tantrums that the other boys can do it so why can’t you, okay? Multiple male orgasm is a try, fail, try again, proposition. The Holy Grail is more than a cup: it’s a fucking grail.

Love yourselves,
– Saboteur

Further Reading:

Male Multiple Ejaculatory Orgasms: A Case Study (1998). Beverly Whipple Rutgers, Brent R. Myers, and Barry R. Komisaruk. Retrieved from https://www.researchgate.net/publication/290308739_Male_multiple_ejaculatory_orgasms_A_case_study.

Saboteur (as he is known on Bateworld) is the author of the book CEDAR: An Ode To Masturbation (as M.B. Timothy) which is available now on Amazon. CEDAR is a sensual celebration of solosexuality through fact and fiction. Timothy has also released an anthology of essays on advanced masturbation called Real Men Masturbate, covering subjects from edging to handsfree ejaculation.