When I was younger, I used to love to bate. It was one of my favorite moments for me to connect to my body, my masculinity, connect to my queerness, and my disability.
From the time I was 12 years old, I would use bating as a way to self-soothe, fall asleep or just de-stress from the world around me. Bating would also help relieve any muscle tension that my disability caused. When I bated, for a few brief moments, my body let go, and I felt free. As a disabled person who uses a wheelchair full-time, and needs help with pretty much everything that you take for granted, being able to rub one out was one of the few things that I can do on my own. Being able to jerk off made me feel independent, strong, important and hot. But all of that would change.
Around 32 years old, due to my disability and the spasticity in my hands as a result of Cerebral Palsy, I couldn’t bate anymore. Every time I tried to pleasure myself or play with my thick crip dick, the pain in my hands would be so intense, that any joy that I would get from bating dissipated, or dissi-bated, if you will. When this happened, I lost a huge part of myself in the process. As a disabled person, bating was the one thing I could do that was 100% mine. And now, this one thing that I cherished most was taken from me. It fucking sucked, bators.
“As a disabled person, bating was the one thing I could do that was 100% mine. And now, this one thing that I cherished most was taken from me. It fucking sucked, bators.”
I want you to think of your fav bating rituals: maybe you take off your pants and strip down to your most comfortable boxers, or maybe you put on grey sweatpants or a jockstrap. Maybe you take sexy cock shots and send them to a bate bud. Perhaps you pair your bating with buttplay, poppers and toys. You grab your favorite lubes and go down, right? Do you turn on a sexy song when you jerk? Now I want you to imagine if you couldn’t do any of those things on your own. How would you feel if you had to ask for help to self-pleasure, if you had to ask for help to be with yourself? As the sexiest disabled bator out there, I struggle with these fears constantly when I think about bating. The shame about bating and my body is all too real. I have to let someone else into my bateworld, even when I don’t want to, and that can be a daunting task.
As a disabled bator, I am here to tell you that there is no shame in asking for a helping hand or two or three. There is no shame in changing your ritual to be more accessible, and there is no shame in redefining what you mean when you say you are going to bate. One of the big things that I do now is instead of focusing on my physical body, I try to connect more fully with my imagination. I tap into a hot fantasy of a scruffy, tatted, ginger man bating me for me. Or, I imagine what it might feel like to be fucked in a dark room if I could stand. I let my mind take bating to delicious places that my body cannot go. And sometimes, I hire a sex worker to help me do the bating that I can’t. And, that’s hot.
“I let my mind take bating to delicious places that my body cannot go. And sometimes, I hire a sex worker to help me do the bating that I can’t. And, that’s hot.”
If you are one of the hundreds of thousands of people who have trouble bating due to disability, old age or injury, I also have a solution for you. In my quest to find the best cumpanion, I have created the world’s first accessible sex toy made by disabled people for everyone: The Bump’n Joystick. With this toy, you can take off the shelf toys, which may have been difficult for you to use, and put them inside our toy, where they will snuggly and securely stay, so you can get your bate back, bro.
To all the bators who can’t bate, you are no less sexy, no less valuable, and no less hot than those who can. Bating is not just a physical act, but a state of mind.
Happy bating to you all,
Andrew Gurza
BateWorld member AAGURZA
Now Streaming! Andrew Gurza – Episode 4 of Bator Training Series Season 5: Rituals
Thanks for sharing bro! X
Thanks for sharing this; I’m not exactly disabled, except when it comes to masturbating. 7 years ago I had a prostatectomy for prostate cancer. It means I cannot ejaculate, nor easily get an erection. But I can orgasm! I found the magic wand is the best for me. I love it when I feel a twinge in my ankles that travel up my legs to by crotch! My problem is how do I jack off when somebody else who expects a boner, and a white ejaculation? I still love human touch and even blow jobs, but most guys feel something is wro9ng when I don’t physically respond, though it feels so damned good. Anybody else in my boat? I would do it by camera with my wand but won’t I be weird not getting hard?
Have you looked into inflatable penile implants??? They make it possible to get a boner anytime, for as long as you want. I have them and love them! Dr. Eid in NYC did mine@
I applaud Andrew and all others who have posted here. I find myself in a wheelchair but not disabled in the groin. But I don’t have an empathetic jerk buddy or another gimpy companion with whom I can broaden and explore. I am.in the fourth quarter of love it emotionally active and looking to meet a fellow celebrant of our genitalia with whom.to initiate what I think of as sensual, spiritual fun. It is a tough sell on dating sites but there must beat least a horde of potential partners nearby. Are there disability chat rooms or message boards where we can meet and greet?