May Has Cum, So Should You! (And Why It Matters)

Happy International MAYsturbation Month!

April showers bring May flowers and also engorged penis’ celebrating International Maysturbation Month, an entire month dedicated to all that we’re about: Masturbation. You know, that mechanical arm gesture simulating self-pleasure, the “up and down,” the greasy albolene strokes that end in an orgasmic eruption of sperm, that pure self-bliss/self-love we can all relate to. There’s nothing I’d rather be doing, but a whole thirty-one days dedicated to nothing but? I’m in, are you!?

It goes without saying that masturbation should be and, well, is celebrated 365 days a year and no other place than Bateworld to prove it, amirite? So what is so special about May? Why is it important? Who celebrates it? How can you celebrate? Read on, my curious maturbating brethren, as we break it all down.

Where The Hell Does Masturbation Month (Now International Masturbation Month) Come From?

I didn’t know myself until doing some research and holy shit — Good Vibrations, a San Francisco based sex shop, established Masturbation Month in 1995 in response to the firing of Surgeon General Dr. Joycelyn Elder who suggested that masturbation be discussed as part of young peoples’ sex education. “We were astounded. It was one of the most sensible things we’d ever heard a government official say — and it cost Elders her job!” says Good Vibrations. They continue with, “Of all the kinds of sex people can have, masturbation is the most universal and important, yet few people talk about it freely — worse, many people still feel it is “second best” or problematic in some way. Masturbation Month lets us emphasize how great it is: it’s natural, common and fun!”

So, huge thanks to them (and Dr. Joycelyn Elder who ignited this flame) for creating a much needed holiday for sexual health awareness and spreading the word on self-love (and the legs of all masturbators!). It’s also true and a fun little bonus that both May and masturbation start with the letter M. We’ve blended the two words in our own dedication of said holiday and call it Maysturbation Month!

It’s A Global Phenomenon!

Maysturbation Month is celebrated in your very town, to the rocky mountains, the lowland jungles of Peru, to the Sahara desert, to the great metropolis of Tokyo, you name it. Perhaps also to the moon. Hey, aliens need to get off, too, right? Every nook of planet Earth (or the universe, rather) beholds (I mean, that’s how ancient it is, come on) a masturbator like yourself expressing self-pleasure, developing and experiencing self-love, sharing and conversing about the importance of sexual health and wellness. Oh, aliens don’t really having anything to do with masturbation month, OR DO THEY!?  I’m just reiterating the fact that every organism, known or unknown, masturbates. It’s no secret and if anyone says they don’t, they’re lying – get over yourselves.

Okay, So Some Sex-Shop Invented It After Some Poor Doctor Lost Her Job, But So What, Masturbation Month Is, Like, Everyday For Me Who Cares.

As it should be, and please, carry on, but this month is dedicated for spreading the awareness; keeping society on its toes, informing them that masturbation and self-sexuality in general are not at all these taboo things a lot of humans still believe – it even has health benefits, too. May is the “birthday” of masturbation, if you will. Masturbation standing in the spotlight of it’s own to be recognized as a normal, healthy thing. We should be rejoicing not mourning. Rupaul says it best “If you can’t love yourself, how the hell you gonna love someone else?”

Rupaul Has Nothing To Do With This Either, But Wait, Health Benefits?

Well, fancy you ask. Our very own Batemaster, teacher of Erotic Engineering, and masturbation activist Bruce P. Grether joins us now to explain:“Yes, thanks for asking. Masturbation has many definite health benefits, physical, mental, and emotional. Here are some:”

• Enjoyment of abundant masturbation is good for self-esteem.
• Breathing deeply while masturbating relaxes you and relieves stress.
• Keeping relaxed during masturbation alkalinizes your blood to balance acid in the body.
• Masturbation releases “happy” brain chemicals into your system (serotonin).
• Specifically increases beneficial dopamine and oxytocin in your body.
• Massaging your balls while you masturbate enhances testosterone production.
• It can help you get better sleep–crucial for health.
• Exercises the entire uro-genital region of the pelvis.
• Full enjoyment of masturbation can inspire you to take good care of yourself.

Thanks, Bruce! See, our body is self-energizing, balancing, and healing all from the very act of masturbating. And we’re not even talking about the crazy amount of cock rockin’ whole body pleasure it gives us!

Alright, I Love Myself, Everyone’s Doing It, I’m Less Stressed Because Of It, So What Are Some Fun Things I Can Do To Celebrate (Other Than The Obvious)?

So many things you can do! For starters, whack your dick awake right now just to make sure it’s paying attention, then:

• Become a Premium Member of Bateworld.com and do it with a buddy!
• If you are a BW member, you can enter to win in our Maysturbation Month Contest Tons of bator prizes to be won.
• Tell your friends it’s Maysturbation Month so you’re busy with yourself until the end of the month.
• Tell them they should be too!
• Blast it on social “Masturbating right now! #MaysturbationMonth” or “Join me, I’m jacking off”
• Slowly watch your friends and family unfriend you. (LOL!)
• Masturbate at least once a day all thirty-one days of May and keep track, compare with your buds at the end.
• Share this article with someone who might think masturbation is a sin and all masturbators are destined for hell. Wait, that might be a bad idea…

What are some other fun things you’ll do? Don’t be lame, let us know in the comments below! And don’t forget, enter to win some hot prizes as Bateworld celebrates Maysturbation Month with a Photo Contest.

Masturbate through May until Jack Off June!