My Massage Exchange Adventures Have Taught Me How To Become A Better Bate Buddy

My Massage Exchange adventures have taught me to become a better bate buddy. While I’m more than happy to explore pleasure by myself with some solo bate time, I feel that it’s also important to maintain your social skills and occasionally connect with other guys for some sexual fun. However, connecting with other guys isn’t always that easy. 

I was complaining to my friend Michael about flakey guys on hook-up apps. He suggested that I give Massage Exchange a try. As the name suggests, this is a platform where you arrange to meet up with another guy and trade massages. Michael reported that he’d had some good experiences on the platform – honestly, I had nothing to lose. 

Although I’d received numerous massages in my time, I’d never really given any. That didn’t seem to be a problem – I created a profile, uploaded some photos, and I was soon messaging guys and figuring out the logistics of getting together for a massage swap. Massage Exchange is a non-commercial site – everyone is just doing it for fun. 

After a couple of months on the site, I’m now 14 guys deep into the world of massage exchange. I’m still totally amateur when it comes to giving a massage but I’m enthusiastic, and I’ve grown in confidence. 

But massage techniques aren’t the only skills that I’ve been learning – my encounters have also taught me a lot about how men experience intimacy and how to navigate the pleasure points of a man’s body. I’ve also learnt that I’ve been taking too narrow an approach to masturbation – in both my solo sessions and when jacking off with a bate buddy.

“My encounters have also taught me a lot about how men experience intimacy and how to navigate the pleasure points of a man’s body.“

Structured Intimacy 

It was Jonathan, a man from Milton Keynes, who helped crystallize for me why I was getting more out of the massage exchange encounters than I’d anticipated. Jonathan had been using the site for a number of years and we were discussing the pros and cons over a cup of tea before getting naked and getting down to business. 

Jonathan said that what he liked about a massage exchange was that it was structured intimacy. As opposed to the back-and-forth negotiation that I’ve often experienced on hook-up apps about who’s going to do what to whom, the framework of the massage gives us a road-map and a shared language that takes a lot of the guesswork out of what’s going to happen when the clothes come off. 

Sidestepping Anal 

Not a lot of anal sex seems to happen in the Massage Exchange world. I’m not saying that everyone is a side, but the emphasis is generally on being sensual, feeling the sexual energy between you, getting off together, and then getting on with your day.

Sure, there’s plenty of oiled-up ass-play, but once we’ve greased each other up and let our hands do the talking, it’s really all about the cock – it’s really all about making his cock cum. 

Learning from the experts 

I’m not exactly a perfectionist, but once I realized that massage exchange was something that I was getting into, I wanted to get better at the actual massage bit. 

Sure, I could have signed up for some kind of course or tutorial, or I could have watched some YouTube videos, but I wanted to learn how to give a sexed-up sensual massage that was going to push the buttons of the various naked men that I was keen to get my hands on. 

You’re not going to find that kind of specialist knowledge on YouTube – I needed to consult the sex-workers of London. 

Lingam Massage 

My first port of call was Artie the Taoist Masseur. Artie specializes in lingam massage – the ancient art of massaging a guy’s cock. 

“The thing about lingam massage is that people assume that the focus is all on the cock, but it’s not – it’s about the whole body…” explained Artie, as I quizzed him before he demonstrated his techniques on me. “The aim is to harness the energy from the cock and then you spread that energy to the whole body – you’re trying to make the body feel what the cock is feeling, you’re turning the whole body into a big cock.” 

Artie is a man who is true to his word – his massage skills are next-level and he absolutely had my whole entire body vibrating with sexual energy. I wasn’t confident that I could replicate what Artie was doing – that obviously takes years of training – but the intention was definitely something that I could try to implement. 

Holistic Massage 

I also called on the advice of BearTiger – he specializes in holistic, sensual massages for men. 

“There’s something super-healing about being touched…” says BearTiger, talking me through his approach as I undressed in readiness for a massage. “There’s something really beautiful in having someone touch your body and massage your body. The energetic connection of a massage can be really powerful.” 

To be honest, I was nodding but I wasn’t totally clear what BearTiger was talking about. But it made complete sense when he began to use every inch of his body as he worked me over on his massage table.

This was a world away from the traditional sports massages that I thought I had to try and emulate – this was prioritizing the energetic connection above everything else. As an amateur masseur, that takes a lot of pressure off – you don’t need to worry about mastering the technicalities, you need to focus on creating a connection with the naked man that’s in front of you.

Every day is a school day 

I’m still enthusiastically organizing massage exchanges with anyone who is up for it – not to try and demonstrate any prowess or techniques but to get naked, oil each other up, and create a sexual connection. 

I don’t necessarily tell the guys that I’m massaging that I’m visualizing them as a giant cock but that’s absolutely what I want them to feel as I figure out their pleasure points, edge them towards orgasm, and eventually push them past the point of no return.

Written by BateWorld member GTVlondon / Host of Podcast: Naked Men Talking. Listen on Spotify