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Ask The Batemaster: I Have Orgasms, But I Don’t Ejaculate

QUESTION: After prostate surgery, I’m lucky. I don’t ejaculate, though I sometimes ooze a little. I do have great erections and have wonderful orgasms, though. I’m 72 and in pretty good shape, so I wonder… can I still get fellows to masturbate with me on cam?

RESPONSE: Why not? You are fortunate, as results after prostate surgery and other treatments can vary a lot. As you probably know, recent evidence reveals that many cases of both prostatitis (enlarged prostate) and the more serious prostate cancer actually progress very slowly. So slowly, in fact, that most medical practitioners have backed off the kind of quick, aggressive treatments often pursued until quite recently. Still get checked at least yearly, even after you’ve been successfully treated.

The prostate contributes its fluid as one of the components of semen, and also acts as a pump, clenching in a series of spasms when you ejaculate (if you ejaculate) to help shoot semen from the penis. The prostate, about grape-sized in a teenager, keeps growing through life and becomes approximately walnut-sized by your 60s or 70s. The urethra passes through this gland that lies directly beneath the bladder, and that’s the route by which the bladder drains fluid into your penis and out the tip.

You have enjoyed a successful procedure and can still enjoy erections and orgasm, which are far more important than ejaculating semen, especially when you are not planning to reproduce. Quite understandably, many men are somewhat obsessed by and attached to the dramatic experience of ejaculation, when semen spurts and pours from the penis. However, many seriously dedicated masturbators (such as myself) choose not to focus on ejaculation, indeed we prefer semen retention. This allows a man to experience many dry orgasms and even multiple orgasms without losing your erection or your desire to continue playing.

Of course, this is similar to what many men call edging, focused on extended pleasure, short of that “edge” also called ejaculatory inevitability, from which there’s no going back, only the blissful, oblivious plunge into the abyss of orgasmic ecstasy. Perhaps you already pursue edging, or even semen retention to prolong and intensify your pleasure

There is no reason you should not be able to find playmates, guys who would like to masturbate with you on video conference or cam. A generous, enthusiastic attitude helps a lot. If the time comes when your playmate wants to ejaculate, you can simply tell him that’s fine with you, but you don’t plan to follow suit. There’s no need to tell him about the medical history involved unless you wish to. Sometimes guys are funny about this issue.

Personally, I very seldom ejaculate on cam (or off), and in my case (at least so far), it’s entirely by choice. The reason I got into this whole realm of encouraging male masturbation is that I wanted to be able to enjoy much longer, more intense penis pleasure. I wanted to be able to spend indefinite intervals savoring and relishing on and on how good it feels.

More power to you, Brother, and please continue to fully enjoy your masturbation practice, both in solo sessions and with other guys online. Self-confidence and experience count for a great deal.

The Bate Master - Bruce P. GretherBRUCE P. GRETHER is the “BateMaster”. Mr. Grether’s lifelong love of penises and masturbation has led him to achieve a level of mastery and understanding of masturbation that is at once unique and extremely rare. He is renowned for both his ability to achieve seemingly endless states of prolonged and intense masturbatory pleasure as well as his skill in passing this knowledge on to his students. Mr. Grether has made it his life’s mission to encourage men to take their practice of masturbation to new levels of personal enrichment and self-discovery.

Mr. Grether is a globally recognized masturbation activist, an accomplished masturbation coach, and a tireless facilitator of masturbation workshops. In 2001 he coined the now popular term “Mindful Masturbation”. He is the author of a best-selling book, The Secret of the Golden Phallus, plus the erotic fantasy novels The Moontusk Chronicles. His website can be found at www.eroticengineering.com.

A note from The Batemaster: I’m honored that the guys at Bateworld have asked me to respond to some questions from male masturbators around the world every week.

Always check with your doctor about any issues you might be experiencing with your sexual organs. Prompt diagnosis and treatment are important. This article’s purpose is to inform and entertain readers and is not a substitute for medical advice or treatment.<


View all posts by The Batemaster (Bruce P. Grether)

How Bruce P. Grether became the Batemaster

Among his earliest memories, Bruce recalls seeing an adult man’s penis swing about anchored in a nest of curly brown hairs when the man was changing clothes. That penis fascinated him and he somehow knew it was of major importance. He also remembers how good it felt to slide down a stairway banister or to climb a tree with pressure between his legs sending delicious sensations all through his body.

At an early age, he played doctor with another boy his age, and the frottage he enjoyed as they rubbed their penises together made him feel One with All Things.

He was older, maybe 9 or 10 years when he figured out how to actually masturbate while taking a shower. Immediately Bruce became a fan of self-pleasure, though, with puberty, he became extremely shy about his body being seen. Still, when his pubic hair sprouted and his penis grew bigger, it astonished him how incredible the sensations could feel with adult genitalia.

All through his 20s and 30s Bruce loved masturbating and did it often. Something kept tell him though, that there could be more to it. None of the books he read about Tantra and Taoist erotic cultivation provided simple how-to instructions. Finally, in his early 40s, he came upon Joseph Kramer’s video about male genital massage: FIRE ON THE MOUNTAIN.

Having no playmates to try this with, he tried it on himself. In the process, he discovered what he soon named “Mindful Masturbation.” For 6 weeks he masturbated for hours every day, and did not ejaculate once! This was the Penis Paradise he had been looking for since his adventures playing doctor as a young boy. He was changed forever and lost most of his shyness and insecurities.

Bruce began to listen deeply to whatever his penis told him. This way he learned more and more about male masturbation, the penis, and he studied human sexuality. Soon he was hired to write professionally for the sex education site JackinWorld (dot) com, which he did for some years under the name “Bruce McFarland.”

Since then, his erotic activism is more radical and he uses his actual given name: Bruce P. Grether, AKA the Batemaster. He has hosted workshops and now does online masturbation coaching. In 2012 his best-selling book THE SECRET OF THE GOLDEN PHALLUS was published and with his handsome young friend Blue Tyger he created the Erotic Engineering site to explore advanced male self-pleasure practices.

Bruce considers himself a Missionary of the Male Mysteries and his work continues.

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7 Comments

  1. Nice explanation about what the prostrate does & good advice too Bruce. Personally I think masturbation is a beautiful & selfish bit of pleasuring that’s totally just for us, our selfish sexual pleasures. For many it can be even more arousing to share it with others either in person or online with a cam or mic.

    And its totally up to you if you choose to confide with a cyber or sex partner about your surgery and you’ll be enjoying yourself immensely orgasm wise but there won’t a cum show. I’m willing to bet they won’t mind at all. Enjoy it! Bate away.

    1. I don’t view “selfishness” as negative in this case, rather it’s self-awareness, and self-esteem. Thanks as always for your comment! – BPG

  2. As a frequent cammer, I know that ejaculation seems like a really important thing, and usually it’s established early in the session whether you’ll be cumming together. Personally, I’d be fine at that point with a guy saying “I’d love to orgasm with you, but I really don’t make much cum”. It may be a problem for some guys, but I think if you give that approach a try, you’ll find plenty of men that don’t really care and would still enjoy getting off with you.

  3. I have masterbated regularly for well over 40 years and although my cum volume has declined in recent years my pleasure and orgasm is still as intense. Masterbation is still extremely pleasurable and I’m always on the
    lookout for ways to enhance my experience.