Guys get conditioned in their teens to believe orgasm and ejaculation have to go together, and that ejaculation is the ultimate, only this is not necessarily the case.
QUESTION: Hey, Bruce, I really “get” the stuff you say about semen retention, and how this goes way beyond edging. But when I masturbate with other guys, or have sex with them, it seems like no one else “gets” this, and they always want to ejaculate. How can I convince them that retaining semen can be even better?
RESPONSE: You may just need to show them or explain some of the following information. Guys get conditioned in their teens to believe orgasm and ejaculation have to go together, and that ejaculation is the ultimate, only this is not necessarily the case. Try to encourage guys to explore the options, offer to explain and demonstrate, if they are open, only don’t push too hard. It’s a good idea, if guys insist on ejaculating, to show enthusiasm, and appreciate it.
Unless someone is willing to try semen retention, they will never know what they are missing. Many men who do try this—which means not ejaculating nearly soften as most men do, though you may still masturbate plenty and have sex—discover that amazing things happen. One thing is that you may end up with more energy, yet a kind of ongoing calm and serenity. Also, each time you resume stimulation of your penis, you find your body “remembers” where it was last time, and very quickly you reach that level of arousal again.
Sometimes clichés contain a lot of truth. For example, in today’s world many people are goal-oriented, especially men. If you always keep focused on the destination, you can miss the journey, which can prove even more valuable. You could miss the forest for the trees! This amazing gift of limitless ecstasy is right in front of you—between your legs!
When you enjoy a lot of penis pleasure, but choose not to ejaculate very often, you don’t have the refractory period, that waiting period after ejaculation before you can enjoy arousal again. You can pop right back into erection almost any time you wish. You may find that your penis and erotic pleasure are in your mind a lot of the time, and you may feel a bit wired.
Also, there are long-term benefits, as you begin to see yourself and your life somewhat differently. You are likely to become more confident, less inclined to criticize yourself, and to feel more motivated to take good care of yourself, as the amount of pure penis pleasure you experience increases, so does the quality of pleasure increase, not just the quantity. This begins to have beneficial influences on your personality, your attitude, and curiously enough, other people pick it up, even when they have no idea what it is. It seems some kind of “shine” emanates from you.
Many men have a “nothing-feels-better-than-ejaculatory-orgasm” barrier that prevents them from even thinking they want to try this semen retention thing. This may be partly a lack of imagination, or at least a lack of the right information. Unless you try semen retention, one of the primary things I teach men, you may miss the opportunity to experience a lot of dry orgasms in a single session, or even multiple orgasms one after another without ejaculating, though in truth you might ooze a few drops. Done right, you won’t lose your erection.
Semen retention is a powerful thing, and once you catch on it is its own reward! However, it is important to learn to keep your pelvis relaxed, to avoid blue balls. Learn conscious breathing, deep belly breathing, and practice keeping relaxed during arousal. Change positions often; explore options. To try this requires an open mind, and a willingness to admit to yourself that you may not know everything possible in the world of masturbation.
The possibilities for bliss in this realm are literally limitless!
BRUCE P. GRETHER is the “BateMaster”. Mr. Grether’s lifelong love of penises and masturbation has led him to achieve a level of mastery and understanding of masturbation that is at once unique and extremely rare. He is renowned for both his ability to achieve seemingly endless states of prolonged and intense masturbatory pleasure as well as his skill in passing this knowledge on to his students. Mr. Grether has made it his life’s mission to encourage men to take their practice of masturbation to new levels of personal enrichment and self-discovery.
Mr. Grether is a globally recognized masturbation activist, an accomplished masturbation coach, and a tireless facilitator of masturbation workshops. In 2001 he coined the now popular term “Mindful Masturbation”. He is the author of a best-selling book, The Secret of the Golden Phallus, plus the erotic fantasy novels The Moontusk Chronicles. His website can be found at www.eroticengineering.com.
A note from The Batemaster: I’m honored that the guys at Bateworld have asked me to respond to some questions from male masturbators around the world every week.
Always check with your doctor about any issues you might be experiencing with your sexual organs. Prompt diagnosis and treatment are important. This article’s purpose is to inform and entertain readers and is not a substitute for medical advice or treatment.<
