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Ask The Batemaster: Am I Evil?

*SPOILER ALERT—Anyone who might be seriously offended by a frank discussion of religion in relation to sexuality is welcome to skip this blog.

QUESTION: Hopefully this is not too evil! I really get off on looking at crucifixes, and paintings of the crucifixion, you know, how Jesus is almost naked there? Not that I like the blood and guts or torture part at all, but his body turns me on. Am I evil?

RESPONSE: (SPOILER ALERT—Anyone who might be seriously offended by a frank discussion of religion in relation to sexuality is welcome to skip this blog) The response to this question depends entirely on who you ask about it, and you lucked out this time, because I don’t think that’s evil at all, and not particularly uncommon. You definitely need to make up your own mind on this. Of course, quite a few seriously religious people, especially Christians, might be offended, but so long as you don’t push your feelings into their faces, there is no reason it needs to be a problem for you. By tradition, Jesus was supposedly a carpenter by trade, so he’s often depicted as quite muscular, and yes, on the cross he usually appears scantily clad.

In fact, according to the gospels at least three or four disciples of Jesus were fishermen, and though in that place and time people were modest about nudity in general, fishermen often worked naked on their boats. In John 21:7 it seems that Peter is naked on his fishing boat. Fishermen often had to plunge into the water and work with their nets, so nakedness may have simply been practical. Also, there is the GOSPEL OF THOMAS, not included in the Bible because it is a recent discovery. In this earliest fragment of gospel which dates from the first century Current Era, the disciples ask, “When will we see you?” Jesus responds, “When you strip off your clothing and dance upon it like little children, unashamed.”

Of course, nakedness was not taken too seriously in the ancient world, even though the people of the Middle East were quite modest 2,000 years ago. Your question reveals the conflicting messages we often see today, over two millennia later, when a religious image that depicts near-nakedness may arouse someone, while erotic pleasure in general may be frowned upon.

For a more contemporary example, look at how sexy a lot of advertising is, while many religious people will tell you that erotic pleasure is wrong, unless enjoyed in the context of marriage, primarily for the purpose of having children, and perhaps not even then. Maybe it’s just a duty? These are toxic beliefs that no sensible person subscribes to.

The truth is that in the Bible there is literally not a word about masturbation. The story of Onan is actually about a man reluctant to impregnate his dead brother’s wife, so though he has sex with her, he pulls out his erection and shoot his wad on the ground. Many of the weirdest religious attitudes about sexuality are clearly added to belief systems long after the original inspiration for those religions, mostly added by old men who probably hated their bodies and don’t want anyone else to enjoy themselves!

With all due respect to true believers, even if Jesus was divine, as well as human, there is no reason to believe he did not have a sex life of some kind. Don’t ever feel guilty or ashamed of admiring a beautiful human body, or even having a fantasy that you think someone else might not approve.

The Bate Master - Bruce P. GretherBRUCE P. GRETHER is the “BateMaster”. Mr. Grether’s lifelong love of penises and masturbation has led him to achieve a level of mastery and understanding of masturbation that is at once unique and extremely rare. He is renowned for both his ability to achieve seemingly endless states of prolonged and intense masturbatory pleasure as well as his skill in passing this knowledge on to his students. Mr. Grether has made it his life’s mission to encourage men to take their practice of masturbation to new levels of personal enrichment and self-discovery.

Mr. Grether is a globally recognized masturbation activist, an accomplished masturbation coach, and a tireless facilitator of masturbation workshops. In 2001 he coined the now popular term “Mindful Masturbation”. He is the author of a best-selling book, The Secret of the Golden Phallus, plus the erotic fantasy novels The Moontusk Chronicles. His website can be found at www.eroticengineering.com.

A note from The Batemaster: I’m honored that the guys at Bateworld have asked me to respond to some questions from male masturbators around the world every week.

Always check with your doctor about any issues you might be experiencing with your sexual organs. Prompt diagnosis and treatment are important. This article’s purpose is to inform and entertain readers and is not a substitute for medical advice or treatment.<


View all posts by The Batemaster (Bruce P. Grether)

How Bruce P. Grether became the Batemaster

Among his earliest memories, Bruce recalls seeing an adult man’s penis swing about anchored in a nest of curly brown hairs when the man was changing clothes. That penis fascinated him and he somehow knew it was of major importance. He also remembers how good it felt to slide down a stairway banister or to climb a tree with pressure between his legs sending delicious sensations all through his body.

At an early age, he played doctor with another boy his age, and the frottage he enjoyed as they rubbed their penises together made him feel One with All Things.

He was older, maybe 9 or 10 years when he figured out how to actually masturbate while taking a shower. Immediately Bruce became a fan of self-pleasure, though, with puberty, he became extremely shy about his body being seen. Still, when his pubic hair sprouted and his penis grew bigger, it astonished him how incredible the sensations could feel with adult genitalia.

All through his 20s and 30s Bruce loved masturbating and did it often. Something kept tell him though, that there could be more to it. None of the books he read about Tantra and Taoist erotic cultivation provided simple how-to instructions. Finally, in his early 40s, he came upon Joseph Kramer’s video about male genital massage: FIRE ON THE MOUNTAIN.

Having no playmates to try this with, he tried it on himself. In the process, he discovered what he soon named “Mindful Masturbation.” For 6 weeks he masturbated for hours every day, and did not ejaculate once! This was the Penis Paradise he had been looking for since his adventures playing doctor as a young boy. He was changed forever and lost most of his shyness and insecurities.

Bruce began to listen deeply to whatever his penis told him. This way he learned more and more about male masturbation, the penis, and he studied human sexuality. Soon he was hired to write professionally for the sex education site JackinWorld (dot) com, which he did for some years under the name “Bruce McFarland.”

Since then, his erotic activism is more radical and he uses his actual given name: Bruce P. Grether, AKA the Batemaster. He has hosted workshops and now does online masturbation coaching. In 2012 his best-selling book THE SECRET OF THE GOLDEN PHALLUS was published and with his handsome young friend Blue Tyger he created the Erotic Engineering site to explore advanced male self-pleasure practices.

Bruce considers himself a Missionary of the Male Mysteries and his work continues.

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3 Comments

  1. It is evil—that’s what makes it fun.

    If you want to categorize sacrilegious as innocuous, it indicates an undisclosed belief system.

    1. I get what you are saying. The forbidden fruit has a lot more appeal than mundane melons… 🙂 – BPG

      1. Thank you for being thoughtful about my comment. I think the point of it is that men who may have been led to believe sexual pleasure to be bad behavior–sometimes, just changing one’s mind isn’t an option, especially when it’s become self-empowered judgment. The solution, for me, was to embrace the silly reality that it is bad–it is how my communities view me. So, what is more evil than doing what has been forbidden. The boys in us like to be naughty, but some of their souls are crushed and they can’t turn it around. I pity the ones whose minds are controlled by another…and it leads to no fun.