“They say it’s not real sex, that it’s only for losers…”

QUESTION:

My buddies at work and in the hood, all act weird because I’m pretty open and proud about how much I love the bate. They tease me and claim they never do it unless they have to. They say it’s not real sex, that it’s only for losers… and I have to wonder, how do I handle this? How do I convince them how great it is!? Or do I just ignore it?

RESPONSE:

Be aware that those dudes who put down masturbation are probably just mainly being less honest than you are. Also, they are repeating common negative PR about male masturbation, which is simply not accurate.

Most men masturbate, unless they have some serious physical health issue or mental health issue. Some men must take pharmaceutical drugs for important medical reasons, which reduce or eliminate their sex-drive. What is unfortunately still common among the vast majority of men (probably close to 100% of human males) who do masturbate, is that sadly many men still have mixed feelings about their habit, including learned guilt and shame. IN this case the word “learned” is important.

Your hood buddies express conditioned opinions that really have no evidential basis. You can actually make a good case for the fact that masturbation is actually the original and primary form of sexual behavior. Masturbation tends to be the first form of erotic pleasure for many people. Other forms of sexual enjoyment tend to grow from it and be variations on the theme of self-pleasure.

Most global cultures still get this backwards. People are often expected to have sex with other people without much information on how to do it well, and before they really learn how to make love with themselves. A more enlightened (and effective) approach is to humble yourself enough to go back and retrain yourself with enhanced masturbation skills. This enhances your connection with other human beings.

Sexuality, physical and emotional pleasure, are the strongest undercurrent in all human experience, something that much human culture and religions throw off with attitudes and beliefs that are simply untrue and inhumane. Sex is often inhibited by authorities as a way to control and limit people.

There is nothing more natural, healthy, and beneficial than discovering in your own experience—despite some odd attitudes and misinformation that inhibits others—that to pleasure yourself is actively beneficial in many ways, and one of life’s greatest joys!

Your hood buddies either don’t get it, or they are pretending. It’s probably best to accept their attitudes and not argue, but they may be missing out. Don’t let their supposed or actual opinions compromise your own full enjoyment of masturbating.

A note from The Batemaster: I’m honored that the guys at Bateworld have asked me to respond to some questions from male masturbators around the world every week.

Always check with your doctor about any issues you might be experiencing with your sexual organs. Prompt diagnosis and treatment are important. This article’s purpose is to inform and entertain readers and is not a substitute for medical advice or treatment.