Why are so many guys still afraid to be proud bators and let the world see?
QUESTION:
In my BateWorld profile I say: If you don’t show both your face and dick in photos, don’t ask to be my friend. Why are there so many headless torsos and bodiless cocks here? This is the 21st Century, man! Why are so many guys still afraid to be proud bators and let the world see?
RESPONSE:
I observe that many men are not willing to show both face and penis together, even in this relatively safe, private context of the site. A man may seriously feel his job could be endangered, or he fears that family members or friends might see him here. Of course, such fears seem unlikely, only not impossible.
When I first began to share images of my erect penis and my masturbation online, almost twenty years ago, I realized that potentially anyone in the world might see these images. That’s possible, but on a site like BateWorld, anyone who sees your photos or videos is likely here for the same basic reason as you: out of interest in penises and masturbation! Bateworld is a place where ideally you can leave fear and shame behind!
Think about it: Masturbation is not illegal or shameful. One problem is that there is still a lot of deep and strong conditioning that there IS something wrong or at least shameful about masturbating!
A man may seriously feel his job could be endangered, or he fears that family members or friends might see him here. Of course, such fears seem unlikely, only not impossible.
In my own work as the Bate Master and an Erotic Wizard with a Mission to promote Mindful masturbation, I decided many years ago to encourage men mainly by my example. At first, I considered using a different name (as I did early on when I wrote columns for Jackinworld using the name “Bruce McFarland”). Then I decided to use my full, actual name. I even insist on the middle initial “P.” to distinguish myself from any other Bruce Grethers on the planet!
I knew some challenges could possibly arise in my personal life, in terms of my job, my privacy, even my personal safety. There are anti-sex fanatics in the world who are just as dangerous as any other kind of fanatics, I suppose. But I decided to encourage openness, shamelessness, and sensible attitudes with my own attitudes.
Thus, my penis and my masturbation are pretty well-known by now, all over the planet! I’m proud of what I do and who I am. I have no regrets. It’s never caused me any major problems.
But every man must consider for himself how far he wants to go with this.
A note from The Batemaster: I’m honored that the guys at Bateworld have asked me to respond to some questions from male masturbators around the world every week.
Always check with your doctor about any issues you might be experiencing with your sexual organs. Prompt diagnosis and treatment are important. This article’s purpose is to inform and entertain readers and is not a substitute for medical advice or treatment.
I totally agree with your answer BM, but unfortunately, there are still too many dirtbags out there that have no moral compass and will blatantly re-post your pics and your vids without your permission. Anecdotally I hear this all the time. Some guys have been really damaged by this unconscionable behaviour.
The fact that this is essentially an unpunishable crime is part of the problem. And that it is so easily done and no one suffers any consequences makes it easier for the perpetrator. The problem is that once it’s out there, no one has control of where it spreads. The tendrils are very, very long.
As a (very) mature male, this is not a big deal. If I get anyone spreading my pics, that’s wonderful and a huge compliment! (Of course, thie NEVER happens LOL) But if i were young and attractive, maybe not so much.
For those in relationships where they are not 100% open with their partners about their proclivities, this is highly problematic for them. Also, those with jobs in public organizations, or so-called “moral authority” positions are ham-strung.
The real problem boils down to our collective shame and society’s puritanical attitudes towards sex in general. Why something so natural as an erection, and ejaculation is treated so shamefully is beyond me, but it is what it is. I say F the Christian/religious fascists.
But I think that BW enables people to inch out of their closets a tiny step at a time. I’ve witnessed this here, thankfully.
What we need to do here is watch our brothers carefully, and support those guys who develop and spread their wings over time. It’s an incredible achievement… and oh-so liberating.
I really love whole body pix and I’ve got a lot of mine in my profile and my bate blog. Never had a problem. But I respect others’ need to keep Bator identity and professional career separate. So my screen name isn’t my birth name. I don’t want someone googling me around other interests to find my cock pix – that could be embarrassing for both of us!
It’s taken me a month for me to try to respond to this succinctly, but bottom line, leaving the bate issue aside, most people don’t want their face associated with anything sexual…be it ‘approved by the bible’ husband-wife procreation sex or whatever. Anything sexual with your face in it can possibly be used against you in certain circumstances. E.g . work, church. I think that kind of explains the direction of my thought.
It is about consent.
For me, I would be happy to be an Exposed Bator with my brothers here on Bateworld or on Cam. I suspect the concern is about loss of control of those photos being passed around outside of B/W onto Twitter or elsewhere.
As an exhibitionist, it is still reasonable to have an expectation of privacy & discretion. That was a statement, not a question.
I would love to show myself completely. I show off mostly ful body, but not with my face on public sites. Not even the ones like bateworld with password protected entry. It’s still no guarantee your pics dont show up at other sites.
I post pics with face to a handful contacts on Skype or other private chats whom I trust. Also not guaranteed. But I was done with my headless bodypics