Ask The Batemaster: Penis Is My God. Is This Heretical?

QUESTION: My penis really is my God, no apologies or shame about this! I liked your response about penis worship, but seriously, when I masturbate, the better it feels, the closer I am to God. I just know that God not only approves, it feels good to God also. This is why God made me as I am, with a penis that craves and gives me so much bliss. Does this sound heretical to you?

RESPONSE: This does not sound heretical at all, Brother! Many seriously religious people would disagree with me, I’m sure, as most religions have somewhat ambiguous, sex-negative, or extremely sex-negative views. Though I don’t personally call my penis “God,” or describe my own sensations and my feelings about it exactly as you do, I can basically relate.

I’m not exactly sure what you mean by God in this case. Though I am not religious in any conventional way, for me the human penis and our enjoyment of it during masturbation is something I can call “spiritual.” To me, the finest of the sensations I feel while I masturbate seem to me to be a sense of connection with the Source of Everything. It is a feeling of actually being connected with everything in existence: not just that idea, but the living, breathing, pulsating, heart-beating reality of it.

Your statement and your experience would doubtless be considered “heretical” by many religious people. That means holding an opinion contrary to accepted religious belief or dogma, by much of the three major Abrahamic religions, and even by many people of other major faiths, such as Hinduism and Buddhism. The beliefs that masturbation is a bad thing, in my opinion, actually stem from the reality that not only is masturbation actually a good thing, healthy and beneficial, but this truth is seen as a threat by religious authorities. 

Religious authorities have often seen male masturbation and the pure penis pleasure it gives you, as a threat precisely because it offers you a direct experience of something that seems “Divine” or exalted beyond other common experiences. In modern times, religious experience has often become a largely mental exercise, a matter of beliefs, ideas, imposed teachings, rather than direct personal experience. It often remains abstract, formalized rituals. So, the direct experience of erotic ecstasy that can take you beyond words, out of your mind into the sense of feeling connected with what you call “God,” must be denounced, because it might in fact replace religion for you. In ancient times, there were sometimes temple prostitutes who gave people such an experience, so there was not such a division between the sacred and sexual.

This taboo about masturbation is also sometimes justified partly with the notion that to “waste your seed” might violate the mandate to reproduce and create more children. Of course, this makes less sense than ever on a planet where our still-growing population of over 7.5 billion is putting such serious strain upon our resources and natural environment. In this day and age, more than ever, you must question authority and think for yourself.

Good for you, and more power to you, if you believe that God approves of your masturbation. In this sense, I certainly agree with that power you call “God”!

A note from The Batemaster: I’m honored that the guys at Bateworld have asked me to respond to some questions from male masturbators around the world every week.

Always check with your doctor about any issues you might be experiencing with your sexual organs. Prompt diagnosis and treatment are important. This article’s purpose is to inform and entertain readers and is not a substitute for medical advice or treatment.