QUESTION:
I’m just 27, and not long ago, my doctor put me on antidepressants. I’m still not all that happy, and part of it is that I’ve always loved to bate. Now, suddenly, my sex drive is quite low, and I sometimes have trouble staying hard, or if I do, coming at all. Help! What can I do about this dreadful situation?
RESPONSE:
I’m not a doctor and cannot directly give you medical advice. However, I strongly sympathize and will discuss the issues involved to the best of my knowledge. Though I’ve never been on antidepressants, I’ve known quite a few people who have been and have studied the medical issues. Many patients treated with such medicines do experience side effects, including some you have mentioned that interfere with your sexual function. Also, I get the impression it may not be curing your depression.
Please discuss this openly and explicitly with the prescribing physician. Such a medicine is usually prescribed by a psychiatrist, though a general practitioner can sometimes take over the script eventually. It sounds as if your treatment program started quite recently. Perhaps your doctor will tell you to give it a chance to help with such issues as depression, stress, anxiety—whatever has contributed to your situation. Of course, always ask a lot of questions.
At the same time, never feel any inhibition or embarrassment when discussing your sexual health with any medical professional. To mention masturbation specifically to anyone can still make some people feel self-conscious or awkward. You know this is something all men do; it is healthy, natural, and, in fact, beneficial. I suggest that, because it is important to you (as it should be), you bite the bullet and speak with the doctor directly about your libido and self-pleasure.
Shameless, guilt-free enjoyment of self-pleasure is an important contributor to mental health, good self-esteem, general happiness, and the basic joy of being alive. Many men still struggle with the guilt and shame associated with talking openly about the subject, much less practicing it. But keep in mind that any negative feelings on the subject are learned; they come from outside you. You know inside yourself that such feelings make no sense and can even cause you actual problems.
Ask your physician about erection-enhancing medicines and whether they can be taken with your other medications. Even if the doctor says “no,” this may alert him or her to how seriously you value your sexual function.
In a broader sense, always make sure to be a proactive patient. Whenever a drug does not seem to be helping in the long run or has serious side effects that affect your quality of life, discuss this openly with the doctor.
Make your own decisions in cooperation with the pro in this case.
A note from The Batemaster: I’m honored that the guys at BateWorld have asked me to respond to some questions from male masturbators around the world every week.
Always check with your doctor about any issues you might be experiencing with your sexual organs. Prompt diagnosis and treatment are important. This article’s purpose is to inform and entertain readers and is not a substitute for medical advice or treatment.
https://www.healthline.com/health/mens-health/mental-health-care-for-men
https://findahelpline.com/us/topics/gender-sexual-identity
Mirtazapine and buspiron are the best antidepressants regarding least sexual side effects.
I had a year’s relationship with someone who had a VERY strong sex drive, who was also on anti-depressants, and she HATED what it did to her sexual response. When I saw her last, she talked about going off the drugs, just to get her sex groove back. Alas, I don’t know if she succeeded, but I sure hope she did. She deserved the good sex and orgasms. And she was a passionate masturbator, as well.
I feel for you man. I’m considerably older than you but I too have been experiencing problems with sex drive and erections. I take two types of anti anxiety medications and I believe they are interfering with my sex drive. I also have testosterone which sometimes gets low. My doctor prescribed replacement therapy but over time it was raising my PSA levels so he took me off of it. There is nothing more frustrating to me than low sex drive which I never had and the inability to keep an erection. Many times I start a bate session and get an erection then loose it and can’t get it back. It makes you feel less of a man which in turn affects me mentally. I think that plays a big part in the problem too because I worry I can’t get an erection or won’t keep it. I have learned not to worry or think about it and lately I have been getting erections. Exercise and proper eating is essential. Keep stress to a minimum which is easier said than done. I also go longer between bates and that helps. Also I have learned from Bruce ejaculation is not always the goal. Quality not quantity orgasms is the way to go. I bate for weeks with erections and sometimes semi erections and sometimes no erection without ejaculating. I just enjoy stroking my penis no matter what. But I can tell you that for me all those weeks bating without ejaculating, when my penis is ready I have a beautiful orgasm and shoot quite a bit. So talk to your doctor and don’t stress out if your penis doesn’t respond properly. You can overcome this. But worrying and frustration will just make it worse.
It’s a side effect of the medication.
Def talk with your doctor. Psychiatry is a lot of trial and error. I was on Wellbutrin with no issues then switched to Prozac to help with anxiety. Killed my sex drive for six weeks but then my body got used to it and now I have no issues. May just take trying a new cocktail….
A few random thoughts.
I’d advise against looking at this as an all-or-nothing situation that must be entirely good or bad. There can be an upside that is not “dreadful.”
Personally, I prefer to masturbate with less than a full erection, maybe 80% hard. The cock is more pliable. Since your question is posted to a BateWorld venue, I assume that penetrative sex is not your primary technique of preference.
As far as “I’m still not that happy,” understand that antidepressants are not happy pills, not uppers. They affect the neural transmitters in the brain (which probably affects the neural transmitters to the penis). There is quite a variety of pharmaceutical options out there. It might be a simple matter of changing to a different one – they all react differently and each patient reacts differently. I have tried several antidepressants and only one has had any meaningful affect – an older one, Trazodone, which also seldom causes erectile issues in patients.
Chemical side effects aside, a slump in sex drive is often reversed by simply getting started. I might not feel especially horny at a given moment, but usually all it takes is for me to grease up the cock and suddenly it remembers what this is all about.
The latter is all too familiar I think for those who take SSRIs. Just like you said, once you whip it out, grab the grease and slick it up, it remembers. Well put.
Yup… High sex drive here and fluoxetine took that away. Makes it difficult to even get hard or have an orgasm…. I stopped taking them for a month, so I could get a could cum back.
I am in total agreement with Show Joe and the Editor. Anxiety drugs could only be part of the problem. Stress and worry plays a big part too. Some anxiety drugs can slow things down some but the biggest thing for me was after a few failed attempts I was expecting it not to happen and that has a psychological effect on getting an erection. You feel like you might not get normal again and that starts a viscous cycle. I overcame it by getting back in the game with some mental changes. If it happened, fine if not I was still going to enjoy my penis no matter what. After time and after relaxing with a clear mind, breathing deeply and keeping calm, things started picking up. I would use feather strokes and firmer strokes all very slow and passionate strokes focusing on sexy thoughts. I started getting semi erections. They would sometimes get to full then wane back to semi. Sometimes I would go soft but the difference was I did not stress or get upset. I did have failures but I took the attitude of not giving a shit. I gave the head a lot of attention too. After a period of time my cock started responding more and more to the point of sometimes getting rock hard. I also chose not to ejaculate every time maybe going a couple of weeks without ejaculating. It is worth waiting because your dick will feel so good especially when edging. Bottom line: Don’t stress out, don’t give up, really breathe deeply and I believe your cock will know what to do. You need to prime the pump to get the water flowing. Have confidence. Don’t worry. Keep at it. If you go in worried and then get frustrated you wont get hard. Take care of your mind, don’t abuse your body and take care of your penis (I keep mine conditioned with a penis cream and I don’t masturbate dry) and it will be good to you way into later life. In addition if nothing works talk to your doctor. If the pills are the lone reason talk with him/her about a different pill.
I had the same issue with Zoloft but then switched to Prozac and no problem. Many of the SSRI’s can have different side effects so ask your doctor to try a different one.
Some of the antidepression/anti-anxiety meds are made from a modified compound that was originally designed to help men who ejaculate prematurely. Sounds great. Unless you are a man who never had a problem with premature ejaculation. While I was on the meds, I really struggled to get myself off. Don’t get me wrong, I really enjoy masturbating. A LOT. But it’s frustrating when “I can’t get no satisfaction”. I do have other things to do.
Successfully discontinued the meds, under doctor’s supervision. I also increased my counseling appointments. So far, so good.
Not all classes of antidepressants come with sexual side-effects. Talk to your prescriber. They may be able to put you on a drug that’s part of a different class of drugs that won’t kill your boner, sex drive, and ability to cum.