Question:
I’m losing sleep? What shall I do?
No matter how much (daily shooting two + loads) I cum, I wake up early every morning (about 3 hrs.) so hard and I don’t go soft ‘till I shoot. At my age of approaching 60 is this normal?
–Tired and Hard
Answer:
Dear Tired and Hard,
Thank you for your question and I’m sorry that your situation is giving you distress. Let me address some of the factors in your inquiry and give you some of my professional opinions. This is not medical advice as I am not a medical professional, but I feel that what I can offer you could be of some service.
First of all, Yay for having, what appears to be a fairly high sex drive at 60. I cannot say whether this iteration of horniness (meant fairly literally in this case) is normal for you. Some guys have a high sex drive early in life that wanes in older age. Some guys are the opposite. And some guys have a fairly consistent sex drive throughout their entire life. Only you can answer whether this is “normal” for you considering your history.
Since you are writing me in regards to this seemingly heightened state of horniness, I’d say this is not typical for your body. And in that light, some things come to mind that I’d like to posit.
Pay Attention!
Our bodies are not static instruments. They are constantly changing, shifting, renewing, fighting, replenishing, growing, etc. and it’s important to pay attention when something is amiss or out of the norm. In this case, your early morning rises and your insatiable erection might be saying something to you. I personally don’t think there is anything medically wrong with you, as you did not mention any pain or discomfort in this situation. But I do think that your body is calling you to pay attention to something far subtler.
Next time this happens and you find yourself awake earlier in the morning with a raging erection, I encourage you to refrain from masturbating as the first response. Take a moment and do some exploration. Sit with the feeling. Take a few deep breaths. If you have a mediation practice, this would be a great time to do it. Bring some consciousness and mindfulness to bear on what’s really going on inside.
Understand that your sexuality and your eroticism do not exist in a vacuum. Many other aspects of your life often affect it. Has your diet changed? Are you dealing with new or reoccurring stressors at work, home, or in your personal life? Has some major life change occurred or is about to? These are the questions you can pose to yourself and your body. Also, see if you can quiet your mind enough to ask your body what it really needs/wants in this very moment. Also ask what your cock needs/wants in this very moment. Ask why you were wakened and why your erection seems so insistent of late.
You might be very surprised by the answer!
The body is wise and we only need to quiet ourselves to listen to it. It is my firm belief that it will speak to us when we take the time to listen. Again, I don’t feel there is anything wrong with you. I do, however, feel that your body might be trying to get your attention. Also, you might want to consider your diet and/or exercise routine as this could definitely contribute to your sleep patterns as well.
Do some inner searching, my friend. I think you might discover some very well needed information. I would love to hear about your progress.
Take care,
Garland J.
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Question:
How much porn is too much porn? I love to masturbate, but sometimes I wonder if I should take a break from porn.
-A
Answer:
Hello, A. Great question.
I know that you are not alone with regards to questioning how much porn is too much. I will say that every person is different in regards to their limits with pretty much everything, as is the case with porn. It is based on an internal meter. The fact that you are asking if it is too much and that you feel that it may be too much for you is a strong indicator that you and your body are sensing that it is indeed too much for you. So…my friend, I would encourage you to listen to yourself about that. Porn has a way of taking us outside of our bodies into an external visual stimulus that can desensitize our bodily sensations. You say that you enjoy masturbation, so my question to you is, do you only masturbate when you watch porn? If so, I would encourage you to experiment with masturbation without porn as well.
Happy experimenting,
Toby
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Garland Jarmon heralds from 7 years as an HIV/AIDS educator and sexual health counselor for individuals and couples. Having a Masters in Social Work and now as a Certified Sexological Bodyworker, he seeks to help all those in the LGBTQIA, straight, and Bator community live a more wholesome and embodied life, full of mindfulness and conscious exploration.
Toby de Luca comes from a background in Education and Massage Therapy. With a Masters in Teaching and also as a Certified Sexological Bodyworker, he to assist folks in facilitating stronger, healthier relationships with their own bodies and their relationships with others.
Together they co-own their own Sex and Erotic Coaching business — Spiritual Eros (www.SpiritualEros.com). They desire to bring to the BateWorld Community an opportunity to have open and honest discussion about issues that many of us face. They believe that everything is an experiment and that the only failed experiment is one you don’t collect the data from. They also understand that because their answers may not fit every lived experience, they welcome community members to offer their own experiences, challenges, and triumphs. They are proponents that healthy community creates healthier lives…and healthy lives, healthier communities!
Garland and Toby are Sexologists and as such are NOT medical doctors or therapists. The opinions, suggestions, and advice given are not meant to be in lieu of your primary care physician’s medical advice. If you are concerned about a medical condition or have a medical emergency, PLEASE contact your doctor, urgent care, or emergency room!
Brothers, we encourage you to exercise your best and highest wisdom and intuition!
If you’d like to submit questions, please email them to [email protected].
