Mindful Masturbation Techniques: Episode 1

Achieving Bator Bliss

Masturbating is actually something like one of those humungous multi-stage rockets that they send up from Cape Canaveral, where you see this gigantic upright thing standing ready and waiting for ignition, then lift-off into Bater Bliss orbit. Yes, there are plenty of specifics that you can actually try that may help your lift-off into the Goon Zone where gravity can’t get you any longer, and you’re in erotic free-fall!

First of all, to prepare your launch-pad, I suggest you lube up your penis, get it a bit fluffed, or if you’re intact, the lube may be less important as that foreskin can glide sweetly over the upper shaft and head without extra lube. All penises are wonderful, so long as we treat them lovingly and with the full attention they deserve!

Vulcan Salute Masturbation Technique

Once your penis is getting thicker and longer, and starting to stand up, or even if it’s already stiff as Morning Wood, try making a “Vulcan Salute” of one hand with your second and third fingers apart, and place that palm down onto your lower belly, then slide the fork around the base of your erection. While to pull up slowly along your shaft using the opposite hand, use those forked fingers to pull the skin of the shaft down a bit at the base. Try using the upper hand that’s on your penis to firmly tug the whole thing upwards while you keep the base pinned down. Feel the shaft skin stretch and relax as you play.

Cup the upper hand over the head of your erect penis, and grip it firmly in those fingers, while you pull upwards with a twisting motion around the neck of the shaft just below the head, and up onto that spongy mushroom.

Now, start again with the upside-down Vulcan Salute technique—only switch hands; place the other hand that was on your penis forked at the base, and pull up slowly, slowly, firmly with the other hand. While keeping the base pinned, use the other hand again to cup the head quite firmly, and twirl up and down upon it with a churning, spiral motion.

When you switch hands, it may feel like a bate buddy’s hands on you!

Perineum Knuckle Massage

Another delicious thing to try is this: Once you’re aroused, bounce your erection on your palm a few times, and enjoy the little slapping sounds, appreciate the weight and thickness and length of it. Then… spread your thighs wide enough that you can reach under your balls while you stroke with the other hand. Squeeze and stroke your penis in your favorite ways, while you crook the thumb of your other hand at a 90-degree angle so that the knuckle sticks out and feels firm.

Move that hand down below your hefty scrotum and press the knuckle firmly against your perineum below your balls. The perineum us the fleshy ridge that runs down from the back of your balls to your anus. While you gloriously stroke your penis, press that knuckle into the perineum and move it slowly upwards, to massage the root of your penis that’s inside your body. Use that knuckle over and over again and try different pressure.

This last process should feel indescribably delicious, and of course, there are plenty more specific techniques to enhance your pure penile pleasure where that one came from. See you in orbit, and let me know how it goes!

In Phallic Brotherhood,
Bruce