Curious About Frotting? Discover Why It’s So Good

Allow me to present a frot metaphor: As the sesh starts out, we’re playing with our own swords, swinging’em around, getting’em ready. We admire each other’s equipment from afar and throw out some compliments about how it looks and the techniques we’re using. Then it’s like, “Wanna compare?“

So we take each other’s swords into our own hands and feel the differences in weight and length—maybe some curvature. We try them out and learn to appreciate the other’s swordsmanship; for now, we understand why the other swings it the way that he does.

We try swinging it the way he does, something that we’re going to try with our own sword once we have it back in our own hands. Then one of you suggests another idea: Hold them up against each other. Metal on metal, two swords as one. Twice the girth, twice the power. If you thought that metaphor was hot, then you are totally into frotting. ⚔️

Frot AKA Cock-To-Cock

For the uninitiated, that’s going cock-to-cock. According to some studies, the number of men into frottage is on the rise, thanks to social networks like BateWorld and the number of articles that have come out on the sex practice over the past few years. We even have specialized toys now that make frotting even more intense, like the CockBlock, which is sponsoring BateWorld’s FROTentine’s Day Contest that I will tell you about further down below. 

We here at the BatorBlog have published a few articles that define what frot is (and how awesome it is!). There is also this informative page over on CockBlock’s site. While a lot of mainstream articles focus on defining what frotting is and handwringing over anal sex being heteronormative, I have seen very little discussion about what I find most interesting about frotting. That is, what is happening on a molecular level that makes frotting feel good, and how those sensations can create a bond between two men.

Finally, in the spirit of FROTentine’s Day, I invite you all to share your own experiences with frotting in the comments!

Pleasurable Foreskin

The uncircumcised penis is believed to have somewhere around 30,000 nerve endings. 20,000 of those are located on the foreskin. So it’s a medical fact that men with foreskins have more sensitive penises and possess the means to have richer orgasms with less effort than those of us whose foreskins have been removed. The reason I phrase it like that is because while us circumcised guys are left with a measly 8,000–10,000 nerve endings on our dicks, our orgasms can be just as rich. We just have to work a little harder for them. 

When a man’s foreskin is removed, he lacks the penis’s natural mechanism of the foreskin rubbing against the front of his shaft, which plays a role in orgasm. What with those extra 20,000 nerve endings? When circumcised men rub the front of their penises, this recreates the sensation that our foreskin was originally meant to create.

When we are children, many of us have our first masturbatory experiences from rubbing our penises against soft objects like couch cushions, pillows, stuffed animals, etc. In a way that a dog without a tail will still wag its tail, men who are circumcised have a subconscious, phantom limb memory of how their penis is supposed to feel, had their foreskin not been taken from them when they were babies.

Phantom-Tail-Wagging

This phantom-tail-wagging comes into play when two men engage in frotting. One man rubbing the shaft and head of his penis against another man’s penis mimics the sensation of having foreskin. Especially just below the head of the penis, the inner foreskin is left behind when the outer foreskin is removed during circumcision. When two men frot, their penises fill the role of the absent outer foreskin for each other; they become each other’s missing limb.

This is not to say that guys with foreskin can’t enjoy frotting. For them, it’s all of that and more! 

Frot For Bisexuals

Now for the bisexuals: penis-frotting is more similar on a molecular level to penile-and-vaginal intercourse than penile-and-anal intercourse, what with all those nerve endings and the similarities between the tissues of the genitalia. Furthermore, men and women can frot (remember “dry humping” from growing up?) and women can do it with their vaginas (it’s called “tribbing”).

One reason why frotting gets written off as foreplay is because it’s not that easy for most people to reach orgasm from it. Not me. My dick loves being on another dick. The good news is that just about anyone can learn to orgasm from frotting. It just takes patience, practice, and the same for any new sexual technique: forgetting your preconceived notions and surrendering to it.

“…anyone can learn to orgasm from frotting. It just takes patience, practice, and the same for any new sexual technique: forgetting your preconceived notions and surrendering to it.”

The hard part, quite honestly, is applying enough pressure. This is why toys such as the CockBlock can help you and your new frot buddy get to the finish line. What I like about the CockBlock is that its casing is elastic, not hard plastic like other strokers. The elastic casing allows you and your partner to control the tightness, and since your dicks are inserted through the two holes, you don’t have to put up with your momentum being ruined by your dicks slipping out of your grip. 

Now let’s get to the second subject, which is . . . 

Mental Pleasure

When having penetrative sex, you might both be having orgasms so good NASA picked them up on their instruments, but let’s be frank: you and your partner are experiencing different orgasms. Unless you are going to the trouble of using toys on parts you’re not using with your partner (and kudos if you can pull that off!).

When you frot, both you and your partner are experiencing the same sensations at the same time. For us sides, that gets us off not only physically but mentally. The same goes for jacking each other side-by-side. A mental connection is formed from experiencing the same thing as our partner in that moment.

Speaking for myself, I get turned off by any kind of forcefulness, domination-submission, or any kind of designation of power dynamic. To a lot of guys, that sounds weak, and I admit that it definitely stems from some past experiences of mine. But to anyone who judges me for not wanting to top or bottom for them I just say, “Fuck off.” From the sounds of it, I wouldn’t have had a good time with them anyway. I like sex to be even-keeled, which to me means the best way of giving someone pleasure is to feel the same thing they are.

I know communication is key in sex, but when I’m topping, I find myself having to constantly check in with my partner. With frotting, I already know because what he’s feeling is what I’m feeling too. Neither of us is really in control. We are both in control. We take turns jerking both of our cocks, and we may even put our hands together and stroke both our cocks with both of our hands in unison. Flesh on flesh, two cocks as one. Twice the girth, twice the power.

Just for the heck of it, I’m throwing in a third category. Why not? FROTentine’s Day only cums once a year!

Visual Titillation

You can find a lot of homemade frotting videos on Twitter (X) and elsewhere, but where you rarely see it are scenes made by professional porn studios. Professional porn scenes may have the performers frotting for a minute, but that’s a far cry from how much time the performers spend sucking dick, eating ass, and fucking. This has always been a real bummer for me and a missed opportunity for the studios. Two hard, lubed-up cocks rubbing against each other is visually titillating.

Who wouldn’t want to see two of their favorite porn stars face-to-face in the king of clubs position, shooting streams of hot cum straight up into the air and falling back down onto their joined hard dicks? Instead, all we ever get from the studios are the same garden variety of cumshot positions.

For as far back as I can remember, I, and almost all of the bate buddies I’ve ever had, skipped past butt-fucking (and rimming) in porn to get to the cumshots or switched over to a different video altogether. To me, butt-fucking is visually boring, and if frotting is becoming more popular, then I would hope porn studios would catch on to the trend and start experimenting with it themselves.

In closing…

If you haven’t tried frotting then I hope this article makes you want to give it a try.

To those who do consider themselves frotters, sides, and/or bators, I hope you find someone to frot with this FROTentine’s Day! If you do, don’t forget to take some frot pics and/or videos and enter them for a chance to win a CockBlock! Deadline is February 2, 2024. 

Written by BateWorld member FROTOLOGIST

Read more from the author here

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Ask The Batemaster: The Spirituality of Frotting

Ask The Batemaster: Frottage

The CockBlock Dual Masturbator Toy Review