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Ask The Batemaster: The Male Visual Thing

A Multi-Sensory Experience!

The Batemaster LogoQuestion: I’ve heard that men are primarily visually stimulated, which is why porn is such a thriving industry. But, in my times alone I often prefer to close my eyes and listen to the sounds that come from porn. Have you ever heard of anyone else like this? Would you call it a fetish?

Response: According to studies, there is some truth to the idea that men are more turned on by the visual aspect of observing explicit sexual content than many women are, and that women more often associate emotional warmth with sexual arousal. However, this is only part of the story: it may even bear some relation to the fact that male genitalia is largely external and dramatically increases in size with stimulation. Guys see this in their own body, though sometimes they may not want to admit how much seeing their own penis turns them on.

The male visual thing is commonly considered a norm, but in reality, erotic stimulation and arousal is a multi-sensory experience. It’s healthy to include such factors as the sounds involved, even sniffing your own armpits, or someone’s underwear, various forms of tactile sensation, such as various fabrics or food like fruit and whipping cream in contact with your body—it’s all good.

There is certainly nothing wrong with you because of your preference for sound over sight in terms of what arouses you. Everyone is different, and there are no masturbation rules in my book except: “Don’t hurt yourself, or hurt anyone else.” Your focus on sound may have to do with some aspect of your personal history, even some childhood experience(s) that you don’t remember. What matters now is that you enjoy yourself.

You could call it a fetish, or preference; those are both just words. A sexual fetish usually refers to an object, a body part, or a situation that is actually necessary for you to enjoy yourself, and sometimes may interfere with your enjoyment of other aspects of erotic pleasure. However, your preference for sound over sight seems like it is not absolute, or a particular problem.

Yes, I’ve heard of similar preferences and many that are a lot more unusual. It would not hurt to explore other options, or even look into your past and see if you can remember overhearing someone having sex or masturbating when you were younger, which might have inspired this. Still, there’s nothing wrong with you in this regard. If something works for you, it certainly does not need fixing.

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The Bate Master - Bruce P. GretherBRUCE P. GRETHER is the “BateMaster”. Mr. Grether’s lifelong love of penises and masturbation has led him to achieve a level of mastery and understanding of masturbation that is at once unique and extremely rare. He is renowned for both his ability to achieve seemingly endless states of prolonged and intense masturbatory pleasure as well as his skill in passing this knowledge on to his students. Mr. Grether has made it his life’s mission to encourage men to take their practice of masturbation to new levels of personal enrichment and self-discovery.

Mr. Grether is a globally recognized masturbation activist, an accomplished masturbation coach, and a tireless facilitator of masturbation workshops. In 2001 he coined the now popular term “Mindful Masturbation”. He is the author of a best-selling book, The Secret of the Golden Phallus, plus the erotic fantasy novels The Moontusk Chronicles. His website can be found at www.eroticengineering.com.

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A note from The Batemaster: I’m honored that the guys at Bateworld have asked me to respond to some questions from male masturbators around the world every week.

Always check with your doctor about any issues you might be experiencing with your sexual organs. Prompt diagnosis and treatment are important. This article’s purpose is to inform and entertain readers and is not a substitute for medical advice or treatment.


View all posts by The Batemaster (Bruce P. Grether)

How Bruce P. Grether became the Batemaster

Among his earliest memories, Bruce recalls seeing an adult man’s penis swing about anchored in a nest of curly brown hairs when the man was changing clothes. That penis fascinated him and he somehow knew it was of major importance. He also remembers how good it felt to slide down a stairway banister or to climb a tree with pressure between his legs sending delicious sensations all through his body.

At an early age, he played doctor with another boy his age, and the frottage he enjoyed as they rubbed their penises together made him feel One with All Things.

He was older, maybe 9 or 10 years when he figured out how to actually masturbate while taking a shower. Immediately Bruce became a fan of self-pleasure, though, with puberty, he became extremely shy about his body being seen. Still, when his pubic hair sprouted and his penis grew bigger, it astonished him how incredible the sensations could feel with adult genitalia.

All through his 20s and 30s Bruce loved masturbating and did it often. Something kept tell him though, that there could be more to it. None of the books he read about Tantra and Taoist erotic cultivation provided simple how-to instructions. Finally, in his early 40s, he came upon Joseph Kramer’s video about male genital massage: FIRE ON THE MOUNTAIN.

Having no playmates to try this with, he tried it on himself. In the process, he discovered what he soon named “Mindful Masturbation.” For 6 weeks he masturbated for hours every day, and did not ejaculate once! This was the Penis Paradise he had been looking for since his adventures playing doctor as a young boy. He was changed forever and lost most of his shyness and insecurities.

Bruce began to listen deeply to whatever his penis told him. This way he learned more and more about male masturbation, the penis, and he studied human sexuality. Soon he was hired to write professionally for the sex education site JackinWorld (dot) com, which he did for some years under the name “Bruce McFarland.”

Since then, his erotic activism is more radical and he uses his actual given name: Bruce P. Grether, AKA the Batemaster. He has hosted workshops and now does online masturbation coaching. In 2012 his best-selling book THE SECRET OF THE GOLDEN PHALLUS was published and with his handsome young friend Blue Tyger he created the Erotic Engineering site to explore advanced male self-pleasure practices.

Bruce considers himself a Missionary of the Male Mysteries and his work continues.

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10 Comments

  1. I can remember the first time I heard a bate trance track called Masturbators, you might know it – it starts with a wolf howling, and my head just went! Blood pumping, altered breathing, I felt drunk. It was so good, I can easily understand how you can be turned on by the sounds of sex and masturbation. I guess it’s like being blindfolded and then played with, other senses being heightened.

    1. Yes, I know that recording and it’s great! Most definitely, explicit or suggestive visuals are far from the only important sources of stimulus for male arousal–this ranges through all the senses to smells, sounds, certain trigger words, tactile sensations. All this blends into various fetishes, specific things or situations that certain individuals find especially arousing. Fascinating realms…

  2. Yes! It’s important to explore a variety things as we explore our sexuality – especially masturbation. The sights and sounds can all contribute to making a session more intense. Visual is likely a very important component. But audio can be as well. And there are plenty of websites around where you can sample them to see. Beautiful Agony is one site where you mainly see the guy/gal/cpl faces as they pleasure themselves & hear them while they’re in the midst of giving themselves wonderful pleasure & then the culmination – an orgasm.

    Your remark about food may work too reminds me of a Seinfeld episode or two where George discovers the sexual powers of a fruit, think mangoes. Soon as he takes a bite of that fruit, he begins making funny faces & comments about things going on – downthere. And its either that episode or another one where ends up taking a meal to bed while he’s in bed with his girlfriend and under the covers going down on her. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fhXU7YXZPYo
    Mangos: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kp4YpEShSKY

    Personally I think its important to give things a try just to see if it works for you

    BW; apalmer5

  3. I ponder this question while I’m doing morning masturbation sitting in the lounger…. I often will have my laptop sitting on the arm of the lounger showing images I have collected of men masturbating, or men with hardons, or redheads – I have lots to choose from. I set the screen background to show me a new image every minute so I can use both hands for the important business. Usually I will glimpse a picture and close my eyes as I jack out the next dry orgasm in a multi-orgasmic cycle that gives me an orgasm each minute. But this is supposed to be a comment about sound… When I’m masturbating I’m usually listening for sounds of pending interruptions, and trying to keep quiet. This is how most of us have trained ourselves to masturbate in our teens, but some men are very vocal, particularly at the point of ejaculation. I encourage men on my massage table to make sounds to guide me in giving them pleasure. I often massage with my eyes closed to better concentrate on the sounds and movements in their bodies – the more feedback I get the better the massage will be. The sounds of other men masturbating is definitely stimulating. Towards the end of a sweat lodge I’ll hear the sounds of hand moving on cock across the pitch dark circle, and then more hands joining, and then little gasps or moans. This rarely happens during a daytime sweat. Now as I masturbate I can hear those same little sounds of hand sliding across the folds of a slippery foreskin. After a couple of dozen orgasms I’m nearing the end of my session – my body is charged with erotic energy and cock is no longer stiff, but I want to try one more experiment. I reset my screen to show photos of myself masturbating – a long outdoor session of assisted masturbation some years ago photo documented by one of the assistants. The other assistant has been reading me stanzas of a poem, The Song of the Godbody, by James Broughton, and I have been replying and this conversation has been fueling the masturbation. The sounds of that session had much to do with the power – the poem, the click of the shutter telling me I’m being seen, the sounds of men moving on a nearby path, and the wind in the trees.

    So the questioner worried about being turned on by the sounds of masturbation is actually guiding us to heightened experiences – letting go of visual stimulation as least for a while. The visual grabs our conscious attention away from sound and touch, Keeping them in balance allows the energy to spiral higher and higher.

  4. Love listening to bate tracks and sounds of guys masturbating and moaning. There are some hot ones on SoundCloud and on bateworld too. Really more turned on by aural stimuli more than visual so I guess I’m a minority? LOVE verbal guys and super turned on by repetitive phrases and words like “masturbate” or even ” bate cock” just saying it over and over with a bate buddy drives me WILD for some reason!

    1. Yes those sounds of ours (gals too) can be very arousing, the faps, changes in breathing & moans. As well our words all add up to heighten our masturbation. Mic’ing off for me is what fuels my bate. Yes for some key words are also triggers, cock, penis, fuck or find their fill in the blank word, you just have listen up or watch them to discover which ones work.

      bw: apalmer5

  5. To appreciate the value of audio with regsrd to sexual stimulation, it helps to start by making a choice, proactively exploring audio stimulation, as a primary source out stimulation, relative to your sexual.experience etc…

    For example, I ‘vividly’ recall…
    When I lived in SF, CA (moved overseas in 2002), I would sometimes hit SteamWorks around 3 or 4PM, or whenever I’d finish with mmm last client at the gym…I’d often rent a private room, then head straight to the hot tub,,,, front row to the Open showers all around the wet area…

    Stoned and increasingly boned, I’d kick back, close my eyes and listen to the uncensored, raw sounds of men…groaning, moaning, cuming, fucking, sucking…uninhibited and UNREAL!!!

    Cut to me, stroking my cock, in my room…door securely left ajar ( around 6 -8 inches) for perving traffic….I’d totally get into being a cocktease, fueled by sounds of their voices, hearing the horny sounds of cock stroking all around me…eyes closed,

  6. Oh yeah man sound plays a big part in my bateworld. Especially if the guy’s are gooning and taking you along with them, and at the crucial point of no return they’re groaning out a “fuuuuccckkkkk ” or a couple of short high pitched sighs that increase in intensity and pitch as they explode sweet sperm all over. That is where my visual need kicks in and I explode My sweet load, as they guys make a heavenly mess all over themselves and who ever happens to be sharing with them. I have got hard and aroused just sharing this with you all.

    1. I love the sound of couples fucking or guys or girls wanking. Staying in Paris recently with my partner we enjoyed a very vocal performance by a couple in the room next door. This was extremely arousing leading us to engage in some noisey fucking ourselves. In fact I was so aroused that after my wife and I had both cum and she had fallen asleep I could not get the sounds out of my head. This gave me a very pleasing erection and an intense desire to masterbate even though it was only about 1/2 an hour since I had cum with my wife.. I enjoyed a very satisfying wank. In the morning the sounds of the couple next door were still in my head and so while my wife was in the shower I enjoyed a nice morning climax and sticky ejaculation.